Build a shared life with intention
Connect around values, practical goals, relationship structure, and the future you want—not just hobbies.
Start with your Partnership Blueprint
Describe the life you want to build together: living arrangements, children, money, timelines, relationship expectations, and communication.
Blueprint Alignment compares two Partnerships Blueprints across life categories so members can see where plans align and where to talk through differences.
See how matching works
Meet the founder
Gynnise Gilbert-Mills — Founder & CEO
Gynnise is the founder of The Purple Pact and the proud owner of approximately 47 open browser tabs at any given moment. She is a wife, mom, entrepreneur, community volunteer, professional idea-haver, and card-carrying member of the “I can probably build that myself” club.
After realizing that people seeking intentional platonic partnerships were being handed dating apps and told to figure it out, she decided to create the platform she wished already existed. Her current responsibilities include product development, community building, marketing, answering emails, overthinking button placement, and adding “just one more feature” before bedtime.
Around here, she is affectionately known as Miss Doing Too Much—and honestly, The Purple Pact probably would not exist if she did any less.
The idea behind The Purple Pact started long before it had a name.
Years ago, I made a pact with my best friend Jon about building a life together if life did not follow the traditional path everyone expected. Life eventually took me in a different direction—I got married, had children, and built a family—but I never forgot that conversation or how comforting it felt to know that partnership did not have to look only one way.
As I learned more about lavender marriages, queerplatonic partnerships, platonic life partners, intentional co-parenting, and chosen families, I realized there were so many people searching for the same thing: someone to build a life with, without being forced into a traditional romantic dating model.
Most platforms were built for dating, hookups, or casual friendships. There was no dedicated place for people to clearly say, “This is the kind of partnership I want,” and find someone who genuinely wanted the same thing.
So, naturally, I decided to build the whole thing myself.
The Purple Pact was created to give people a safer, more thoughtful way to connect, communicate, and create partnerships that actually fit their lives—not the lives society assumes they should want.
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Frequently asked questions
How many people are on The Purple Pact right now?
The Purple Pact is building its First 100 beta community. The live First 100 counter shows enrolled beta testers, not a promise of compatible matches. Testers are helping shape both the product and the early matching pool before wider launch. The pool is still small, and joining does not guarantee a match or a particular rate of growth.
What is The Purple Pact?
The Purple Pact is a compatibility-matching and community platform for adults seeking intentional partnerships outside the traditional dating model. We support many relationship structures, including lavender marriages, mixed-orientation relationships, queerplatonic partnerships (QPRs), platonic life partnerships, intentional co-parenting, companionship, chosen family, and other partnerships defined by the people in them. Our approach focuses on shared values, life goals, boundaries, expectations, and long-term compatibility rather than assuming every relationship must follow the same romantic path. Romance isn't required, but it isn't prohibited either. Partnership is yours to define.
What is a lavender marriage?
Historically, a lavender marriage referred to a marriage of convenience, often involving LGBTQ+ individuals, sometimes entered into to navigate social expectations, protect privacy, or conceal a person's sexual orientation. Today, the term is also used more broadly to describe intentionally arranged marriages built around shared goals, companionship, family, mutual support, or practical partnership rather than following a conventional romantic relationship model. Every lavender marriage is different. Some include romance or intimacy, while others do not. Partners may have different romantic or sexual orientations, needs, and expectations. What matters is that both people understand and willingly agree to the relationship's structure, boundaries, responsibilities, and commitments.
Is this a romantic relationship platform?
The Purple Pact supports intentional partnerships across a range of relationship structures. Romantic or sexual attraction is not required to participate, but romance, intimacy, and sexual relationships are not universally prohibited. Members define their partnerships through mutual understanding, informed agreement, clear boundaries, compatibility, and shared expectations. "No romance required" means romance is optional, not forbidden.
Who is this platform for?
The Purple Pact is for adults who want meaningful, intentional partnerships that reflect their individual values, needs, and life goals. Our community welcomes people of all romantic and sexual orientations, gender identities, and backgrounds, including aromantic and asexual individuals, LGBTQ+ and heterosexual adults, people exploring mixed-orientation relationships or lavender marriages, intentional co-parents, queerplatonic partners, and people seeking lifelong companionship or chosen family. You don't need to identify with a particular relationship label to belong here. Whether you're looking for someone to build a family with, share responsibilities, create a home, plan a future, or form a committed partnership on your own terms, The Purple Pact is designed to help you explore compatibility with people who share your vision.
How does matching work?
We use a detailed compatibility questionnaire covering values, lifestyle, family goals, and partnership vision. Your answers are compared with potential partners to generate a compatibility score. You can also browse profiles and filter by location, partnership type, and other preferences.
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